3 Unexpected Benefits of Being SingleMar 03, 2023
If you've been single any length of time, or even just existed.... it's likely you're aware that being single has it's stigmas, especially for women.
From being called "cat lady", to being pitied and viewed as incomplete without a partner. But for many of us, this image is a far cry from the lived experience - and we're not staying quiet about it.
I've been single for 6 years, and while I don't pretend it was a breeze (is life ever??) it's been one of the most self-defining and fulfilling eras of my life. I've discovered more about myself, my mind, and what I want than I ever did while in and out of relationships.
Society doesn't really share the up of being single, so today I'm taking it upon myself to share 3 of the unexpected benefits I WISH someone had told me as a newbie single:
Spiritual growth: Being single allows for a decent investment of time and energy to focus on spiritual practices and personal growth, to learn what you think and feel. Without a partner's involvement (which may or may not be positive depending on the person and situation), you can take the time to connect with yourself and your spirituality, which can lead to a deeper understanding of yourself and the world.
No need to compromise: Let's face it, healthy relationships require compromise as two (or more) people navigate life together. But when you're single, you don't have to compromise on anything! This is a time in your life (or all of it) to truly indulge in yourself. You can decorate your home however you want, move cities on a whim, even down to taking up as much space in bed as you like - the flexibility that can come with being single is often a crave-worthy freedom many others may be dreaming of!
Relationship Peace and Choice: Well-matched relationships can be incredibly beneficial and enriching to our lives... but poorly-matched relationships can bring confusion, pain, and drama. While I often try to steer clear of "being single's good because it's better than being in a miserable relationship" comparisons, there's an undeniable truth to the peace that being single can bring over being in a relationship for the sake of being in a relationship. There are better ways to spend your time and energy when you're not hell-bent on making something work for the sake of it, giving yourself choice in your relationships and dating life.
Being single isn't just a default option to "I'm not in a relationship", it can be a fulfilling lifestyle choice for either a season in or for your whole life. It's a valid and rewarding choice - and it's not anti-relationships to enjoy it!
If you're single and want a relationship in the future, learning to love your single life can help you gain clarity on what you want in a future relationship - take the time and space to reflect on your past experiences, your values, and your goals. This can help you identify what you want and need in a partner, and what you're willing to compromise on. This self-awareness can make you a more confident and intentional dater if and when you do decide to pursue a romantic relationship.
Key Takeaway: Your relationship with yourself and being single is 100% your own - you don't have to love every second of it, especially in a world that often tells you otherwise. But, it's your journey none-the-less. Embrace it, hate it, learn it - discover what it means to you.
P.s. Want some more 1:1 support? Discover how we can help you with The Heart Led Coaching and Therapy.
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